Archive for the ‘Books’ Category
The Kazdin Method for Parenting…
September 27th, 2009
What this book is about
Don’t let the name fool you: The Kazdin Method for Parenting the Defiant Child: With No Pills, No Therapy, No Contest of Wills is a good system of healthy motivation, using appropriate and relevant praise, that gives any child a reason to want to learn new habits and behaviors. Even starting with this method, with or without the rewards chart, at a young age will create a happy child (and parent) that know how to get things done.
Why this method is different
The beginning of this book chronicles conversations Kazdin has had with parents who have come to him for help with their children. He addresses most reservations that parents have with regards to his methods so they can get on-board with his method. Sure, you’ve done star charts, attempts at positive speaking, dangling tangible rewards in front of your child to motivate them but they still won’t cooperate or listen to you.
This method comes out of a scientific approach to how humans are motivated and uses relevant, appropriate praise, touching, etc. to encourage your child to want to comply without feeling manipulated or bribed.
Potential uses
You can use this to affect behavior and specific or general habits:
- Bedtime routines
- Morning routines
- Cleaning up
- Getting along with siblings
- Taking care of pets
- Setting the table for dinner
- Staying in bed after lights-out
- etc.
My experience
I was at the end of my rope with my youngest, who is very strong willed. I had tried as many positive things as I could think of and the only things that motivated her was fear or the promise of getting something that I didn’t want to give her (i.e. candy). Talk about a no-win situation. This book really helped move past our contest of wills and contributed to her being more considerate, thoughtful, helpful, and wanting to contribute. She even started doing things we didn’t even ask her to do. What a joy!
Praising reservations addressed
I remember listening to Kim John Payne at a school event some years back. He mentioned how inappropriate praise can cause the opposite affect and how inappropriate praise is used to develop post traumatic stress syndrome in military personnel during basic training (causing post traumatic stress syndrome is the only way to get someone to kill another human being, so I’m told).
The Kazdin Method uses APPROPRIATE praise that is specific to what your child is doing in the moment and offered as soon as they start the desired behavior. To counter the possible affects of my daughter seeking approval outside of herself (one of my concerns around praising her a lot, but better then fear methods) I point her back to herself to look inside for her own internal sense of self and approval when she comes looking to me for validation. You know what I mean: follow your guidance and you’ll always do the right things with your children.
Alternatives
Imagine the alternatives that a lot of parents resort to: threatening, instilling fear, making the child feel unsafe, punishing. None of these are desired nor do they ultimately work. They all backfire in the end.
Read the book and watch the DVD for yourself
Don’t take my word for it or follow my sketchy explanations of the method as I’ve mentioned them here. I tried to explain it to my husband and we watched the included DVD together but he is still reading the book to really understand it and be able to use it.
Conclusions
The Kazdin Method will help you regain your role as parent as well as allowing you to have more fun with your children. What a stress reliever. My daughter and I are now enjoying each other so much more.
View book details at Amazon.com: The Kazdin Method for Parenting the Defiant Child: With No Pills, No Therapy, No Contest of Wills
Posted in Baby Bargains
September 8th, 2009
What’s good about this book
The authors buy the items themselves so they are motivated to tell the truth and not side with any one manufacture over another.
What I didn’t like about this book
I don’t like the way they put down the book, What to Eat When Your Expecting; you should make your own decision on that one. The model offered in What to Eat When Your Expecting is an ideal and if we aim for an ideal then we will be doing better than we would otherwise. Especially good sections to read Products that are a waste of money.
What I didn’t like/would change/wouldn’t recommend about this book
I don’t like the way they put down the book, What to Eat When You’re Expecting; you should make your own decision on that one. (One of their reasons for not getting it is because it’s a sequel. Well, Baby Bargains is a sequel too.) The eating model offered in that book is an ideal and if we aim for an ideal then we will be doing better than we would have otherwise. (Sugar is NOT a food group and the authors of What to Eat When You’re Expecting know that.)
Especially good sections to read
Products that are a waste of money. (Seems contradictory, doesn’t it?)
What to skip
Sections on items that don’t apply to you or your child’s needs.
When to get this book
With enough time to read before the baby comes since you’ll want to do your shopping well ahead of time.
Final Comments
As always you should take things to heart and see how they feel to you and your gut when making decisions.
View book details at Amazon.com: Baby Bargains, 8th Edition: Secrets to Saving 20% to 50% on Baby Furniture, Gear, Clothes, Toys, Maternity Wear and Much, Much More!
Rational Fasting
May 28th, 2009
About this book
Here is yet more information from Arnold Ehret on his methods of healing the body and returning it to vibrant health. This book focuses on the role fasting plays in healing the body of any disease.
Conclusions
This book can be used in conjunction with his Mucusless Diet Healing System. I enjoyed reading this book and getting a clearer picture of the role fasting plays and how it can be done safely. Read this book before you go and do a fast yourself. Also check with your health care practitioner before changing your diet or your lifestyle and especially before fasting.
View product details at Amazon: Rational Fasting
Illusions: The Adventures of a Reluctant Messiah
March 21st, 2009
What this book is about
This is another adventure story that shifts paradigms and opens up the consciousness to a whole new world of possibilities. One reluctant messiah mentors another and the results range from interesting to humorous and outright outrageous all with the result of learning and passing the torch.
My impressions
I really loved this book because it was an adventure story that also shifted my paradigm and opened my mind and consciousness to infinite possibilities. We can master this world and help others but realize that we all have a mission in life. Cool book…
If you were a messiah, would you be reluctant?
View book details at Amazon: Illusions: The Adventures of a Reluctant Messiah
The Three Questions
June 6th, 2008
What this book is about
Nikolai searches for answers to three burning questions he has about life. Through the help of a wise old turtle he realizes, through his own choices and activity in different circumstances, that he already has internalized the answers to these questions and is living them.
View book details at Amazon: The Three Questions